No one answered when I rang the doorbell. Are they already asleep? Luckily, the door was left open. I entered the house and lay Hanezawa down on the nearby sofa. She was still asleep. I thought of bringing her to her room since she might not feel comfortable sleeping on the sofa but I had no idea where it was. Their house was quite big and there were many rooms to choose from. I removed her shoes and undo her hair so she would feel a bit more comfortable. After resting for a while, I decided to leave.
“Thank you…” I heard her murmured.
I left without another word. That was the last time I saw her. In fact, I never expect myself to see her again.
Not in another five years.
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When we got back to my apartment, I lay her down on my futon, removed her shoes and placed a glass of water near her just in case she feels thirsty when she wakes up. Following that, I rested my back on the wall and let myself become sober. I didn't feel drunk even though I drank more alcohol than I probably should. Normally, the same amount of alcohol will knock me out. I guess being with her helped me control my senses. I needed to stay awake and alert so I could protect her. I did it for the sake of a girl that only said “Hi” to me before we met at Starbucks.
Maybe I should be the one to tell her what she said to me back in the bar. I should be the one who should be saying that it's all her fault that I suddenly feel confused. It's all her fault that I started remembering things that I never thought I will recall. If she hadn't turned to look at me at Starbucks, if she hadn't approached me then I would have came home much earlier. However, she did come up to me and greeted me with a “Hey”, the second word that she ever spoke to me and even invited me for a drink without any money on her. Yeah, someday I should tell her that. I should really tell her that.
However, let me look at her closely.
Let me look at the girl who clearly reminded and explained to me the word, “Regret”.
She was a lot better than any dictionary in the world.
I woke up the next day sleeping on my futon. Hanezawa was nowhere to be seen. I assumed she left while I was sleeping. The sun was already up. Feeling really light-headed, I made my way to the bathroom to wash up. I smelled really bad due to the alcohol I drank yesterday. Something caught my attention. It was the full breakfast meal waiting for me at the table together with a note on the side.
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“Thank you last night and I take back what I said about you. You are real. – Hanezawa Kana”
I flipped the note and there was something else written on the other side. I thought it was her phone number but it wasn't.
“P.S. I thought of visiting Ryuu and his wife when I'm finally ready. I hope you can be by my side when that time comes. I'll drop by your apartment sometime.”
She did not mention when would it be on the note but I admit that I had never been more excited about going home since that day.
“You only gave me two chances even though I have known you all these years. I had two chances to tell you everything and I always had the courage to do so. Or so I thought. However it is kind of unfair. I am not complaining about how few chances I had but I think you are the one who is unfair. You are so unfair. In both of the chances that you gave me, you never listened to me. You were always drunk and I always end up talking to myself. Lonely isn't?”
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