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Memories and Chances Part 3

Memories and Chances Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

 

“I assume you didn't attend the ceremony.”
I hadn't seen her that day and Ryuu seemed sad about it. He was expecting to see her.
“You're right.” She said.
“I didn't go.”
“Ryuu was expecting to see you.”
Hanezawa nodded as if she already knew that. She then asked me if I wanted to know the reason behind her absence.
“You would tell me otherwise even if I said no, right?”
She laughed at my comment.
“I was being selfish. I thought only Ryuu and I shared a special connection. I mean, we practically spent half our lives together. We knew each other's secrets and dreams. When we entered high school, I was a little sad that he found a whole new world for himself. He met new friends and had quite a number of girlfriends. I thought he would never have time for me but he would always find time to drop by my house once a week. He would always tell me the good things that happened to him, how he enjoyed playing softball with you and other friends and how annoying were the tons of love letters he received everyday.”
I smiled at her.
“Maybe that's the reason why you didn't give him one.”
Hanezawa gazed at me in surprise. Seconds later, her expression changed into that of a shy little girl. Her face was red.
“Motoharu, would it be weird if I tell you that I love him?”
“It will be a lot weirder if you didn't.”

(Read Related : Romance Stories Online)

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In the end, my friend whom I was waiting for wasn't able to come. He told me that something cropped up. I didn't mind and told him that it was okay.

I thought Hanezawa would leave after I told her about my change of plans. However, she came back after walking off initially and asked me if I wanted to go out and have a drink somewhere else. She said she wanted to talk more. I agreed since I had time and we went to a newly built bar named Vanilla Lemon in the backstreets of Shinjuku. The place was small but good. They had someone playing a familiar mellow piano piece. There were a few people drinking.

We ordered vodka. During the first few drinks, neither of us talked. We drank and savoured the liquor as it made invisible lines in our throats. Several times, drunken old men would try to hit on Hanezawa but I made them leave on seeing her discomfort. If they wouldn't, I would generously walk them outside and call a taxi for them so they could go home.

It was already nine o'clock or twenty one hundred hours when I checked the time and I was walking my seventh man of the night outside. I realized that we have been drinking for four hours straight. I called a taxi and entrusted the drunken guy to the driver. When I got back into the bar, Hanezawa was sitting with her arms wrapped around her knees, swaying with the music. Oh no, she's drunk.

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I asked if she's feeling okay.
“You know what?” She answered.
“It's entirely your fault that I'm feeling miserable again.”
I took the seat beside her and refilled my glass.
“Really?”
Now, she's blaming me.
“Hell yeah! If I hadn't seen your face, I wouldn't have remembered things. I would have been in my friend's apartment and we would be watching this drama called… Oh no I forgot the name. Anyway, I would have been with her right now! But no! You showed your face in that coffee shop and I saw you there! It would have been better if I didn't turn around at that moment but I did. I even approached you! Now, memories are coming back to me, flowing like hell and I don't even like it!”
“But at least you're not like a wandering soul now.”
That calmed Hanezawa down. She sighed and drank another glass.
“Tell me. You're regretting that you didn't let Ryuu know what you felt for him, right?”
I heard her sigh again. It was a long, deep sigh.
“I had the chances, Motoharu. Ryuu gave me lots of them. However, I just didn't have the courage to tell him and I hated myself for that.”
I saw her bury her head on her knees and I felt kind of sad for her. She must have really wanted to convey her feelings but one thing prevented her. Fear. It was the fear of being rejected and the fear of losing everything if things didn't go the way she wanted.

“If we had been much closer before, would you ever fall in love with me?'
I was taken aback by her question. I didn't expect it coming. Nevertheless, I thought I ought to answer her. She might go berserk if I didn't. After all, she’s drunk. However, that wasn’t the only reason. I felt that I really need to answer the question. Cold sweat ran down my cheeks. I told her what was on my mind at that time.

Memories and Chances Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

 

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