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Dolce Vita Part 1

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DOLCE VITA (French) --- SWEET TIMES
I met her on the net, how? I can't remember, but it seems to me that it is this 'little theory' which I declared in the cyberspace that caught her attention.

"If I have a million dollars, I would buy a house. Do I have a million?"
"No. That's why I don't have a house."
"If I have wings, I can fly. Do I have wings?"
"No. So I can never fly."

"If all the waters are drawn out of Pacific Ocean, but it still can't put off the flame of love between us. Can all the waters of Pacific Ocean be drawn off?"
"No. That’s why I don't love you."
That's me, a typical science student. First, you come up with an assumption, then you fit a suitable conclusion.

If the proposed assumption doesn't stand at all, then everything is just bullshit. I guess this is what they call 'unromantic'.
But she is an exception. She actually mailed me and said that I am an 'interesting' person.
'Interesting’? What a word to use on me, it's like using 'faithful' on Mr. Clinton. I thought this gal must be a low-IQ organism, or suffering from serious brain damage.
Anyway, her nick doesn't seems so bad
-FLYNDANCE -
That’s quite a unique one.
But I was warning myself: Hello, this is the virtual world of Internet. Who knows what might be lurking behind a beautiful nick.
Talking from experience, most of the time it will be a 'dinosaur' in disguise, the only differences will be whether it is a carnivore or a herbivore. But, I know she is way different from a 'dinosaur', she is special.

So I guess its time for the appearance of FlyNDance.
Ever since she mailed to tell me that I am 'interesting', I was always wishing to meet her in #ajcrr. Too bad, lady luck was just not on my side. So I can only reply her letter to tell her that I will start to train myself to become an 'interesting' person, just to show that she is far-sighted.
She replied my reply, I replied her reply to my reply, she again replied my reply to her reply.....blah blah.....blah....
Oh no, I just started a chain-reaction!
Actually what interested me the most is this 'para' she wrote in one of the mails....
'I dance slightly, amidst the crowd.
Your glance on me be it surprise, be it admiration, It ain't gonna stop my rhythm.
'Cos it's not your glance that made me dance, it's my heart of youth.'
I simply cannot relate this gal to any of the 'dinosaurs'.
But if she really is a dinosaur, I am willing to let her have her fill.
Tye, my best pal unfortunately, noticed my little affair with FlyNDance, and has been perpetually warning me about this....
"HELLO!!! You don't even know what she looks like, why take the risk? Maybe 'she' is a guy!! Haha!!"
I can't blame Tye for his ignorance. Ever since he was dumped by Sally in Sec 4, he has become a renowned 'playboy'.
As the saying goes: "Once bitten, Twice shy".
In this case, after Tye was bitten, he has mastered the art of skinning snakes alive, and make into soup. But he got all the factors to be a playboy, I always think he is the 19 year-old version of Brad Pitt.
Tall, handsome and got this tongue that causes diabetes in every women he targets. I don't think he can even remember how many girlfriends he had .

I went online that night, log onto #ajcrr and..... Yesh!! She is there!!

Before I can get over the surprise and the daze, she sent me a message.....
"hey slorr...so late liao haven't slept ahh??"
Now what? Now what??!! Ok ok, I had to calm down first. I swallowed hard on my saliva, took a few deep breath.
Now where is that Tye when I needed him most at such crucial moment, somebody to tell me what to say to her.
How am I going to attract her with my pathetic humour which has gone stale.
"slorr... me in a foul mood today...can't sleep.. u leh??"
MOTHER'S (direct translation to Chinese), what slorr slorr...

now when I read it twice in a row, I am beginning to feel disgusted in that nick Tye gave me. Tye said that: "Who knows? It might attract some innocent gals into talking to you.... Haha...."
"I am not feeling very good too.... so let's sad together."
Finally squeezed a sentence out, but I can already feel droplets of sweat forming on my forehead.
Actually I m not in a bad mood, I just wanna follow up her topic that's all.
And if she ask for the reason for my feeling down, I can say:
"since u r feeling down, how can I ever be happy?"
I know it sounds mushy, but Tye said: "MUSHYNESS IS THE FUNDAMENTAL TO ALL COURTSHIP."
And gals are a very weird species, they trust their ears far more than their eyes.
So instead of doing 10 things to impress her, why not just say a sentence to move her.
"ok... but u haven't greet me leh..."
DAMNIT! How can I forget simple manners to gals. To think they call me 'MR COURTEOUS' in school.
If this thing ever leaks out in school, I would lost all my female fans.
"nice to meet u...miss long-hair..."
I've been wishing that she's keeping long hair.

Tye said that:
"FlyNDance...hmm...she would either be long-haired or a desperado, because when gals dance, only 2 parts of them may fly: hair and skirt.
So if she doesn't has long hair, that means her skirt flies when she dances, AH-HA!! This has a certain sexual hint in it... haha.." "heh? how u know I got long hair?"
BINGO!! Heaven is on my side this time. It goes to prove that she is not a DESPERADO. Yesh!!

"not only that....I also know u seldom wear skirt...."
I increased the stake, if I am correct this time, peace on earth forever.
"err... I guess u r rite lor.. but how u know one?"
HAHAHAHAHA.... I m good ahh...
"just guess..."
"ok lor... hey slorr... tell u wat.. me tired liaoz... u
coming online tomorrow morning??" "ya... y??.."
Please...please...please say the u coming too, if not I m going to kill myself for letting u go tonight.
"I’ll see ya tomorrow at 10 am then...good night..."
"er.. should be today at 10 am.. ok.. good night too"
I just blurted out a last sentence....

Offline. Suddenly I was so impressed by my performance just now.
But is the season of spring really arriving for me? I wish.... "slorr... what a coincidence ahh..."
"yeh... I m not late." "ya lor... so qiao.."
Gals are weird, I thought we already had an arrangement, why do I have to pretend that its not.
They must have watched too many movies, and like to think that guys they met due to the thing called 'fate' is the best thing that can happen to their love life.
"slorr.... u talking nonsense lah..."
"NONSENSE??? ok, let me tell u what nonsense... Summer's beach, the guy must be good at running, with broad shoulders, dark complexion with a tint of redness, sparkling eyes and loud laughter.
Then he will call out loud the name of the gal, running towards her, carry her and spin 3 rounds anticlockwisely."
"slorr.... u siao liaoz ahh??"
"I siao? Ok...let's change a location then. Deep in the mountains, the guy must have long hair, gotta have the look of an artist, carries a sketching stand, a few pieces of drawings, and u can see birds stop over at his side, admiring his work. and there will be a gal whose the model....most probably naked."

Dolce Vita Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7