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The Fortune Cookie Prophecy Part 2

The Fortune Cookie Prophecy Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

 

1. No dates recommended by my mother (moms don't understand the sex appeal factor).

2. No dates recommended by a female (they're too easy on each other).

3. No dates recommended by a single guy friend (if she's so awesome, how come he hasn't asked her out?).

In three simple steps, I eliminated ninety percent of all my blind dates, including one recommended by my old friend Karen. She called one evening to tell me that she had become good friends with a beautiful girl who reminded her of me. She said she knew we would hit it off.

"Sorry." I said.
"You're ruled out by rule number two."
"Don," she said,
"you're crazy, and your silly rules are eliminating the girl you've been waiting for. But have it your way. Just take her name and phone number and when you change your mind, call her."

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To get Karen to stop bothering me about it, I said I would. The girl's name was Susan Maready. I never called her.

Just a couple of weeks later, I ran into my old buddy Tod in the university cafeteria. "Ted," I said.
"you look like you're walking on air."
"Can you see stars under my feet?" He said, laughing.
"The fact is, I just got engaged last night."
"Hey, congratulations!"
"Yeah," he said,
"at thirty-two, I was beginning to wonder if any woman was going to have me."
He pulled his wallet out of his pocket.
"Here," he said, suddenly serious,
"look at this."

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It was a thin strip of paper from a fortune cookie.
"You will be married within a year." It said.
"That's wild." I said.
"They usually say something that would fit anyone, like 'You have a magnetic personality.' They were really taking a chance with that one."
"No kidding." He said.
"And look at me now."

The Fortune Cookie Prophecy Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

 

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