Real Life Stories
Abortion in Ears Part 1

Abortion in Ears Part 1 | 2

My wife is an Ear, Nose and Throat Surgeon while I am a Gynaecologist. This can lead to some complications as I recently learned to my anguish. A General Practitioner called me up and told me that she is sending a patient of hers for an abortion. Unknown to me, she had also referred a female for removal of earwax to my wife.

I duly informed the receptionist to send the patient right in as she was expected. Due to Murphy’s Law, it was natural that the patient who wanted wax removed from her ear end up with me. This is the conversation that I had with the patient.

"Please come in and be seated." I said with a big smile.
I always have a big smile when I am going to earn some money. The patient gave a feeble smile and sat hesitantly on the edge of the chair.

"Relax."
"Doctor, will this hurt a lot?"
"Not at all."
The patient relaxed visibly.
"You know something, Doctor, we tried removing it at home but we failed."
I was shocked.
"Thank God. Trying this at home can cause serious complications."
"I first tried to remove it by jumping up and down, but it just wouldn't budge."
I smiled and said, "If it were that easy, who would need doctors?"

She gave a cute smile and said, "Yeah! My neighbour tried to remove it with his finger, but the hole is so small that he used a hair pin."
"Oh my God!"
"Yes! My mother even tried removing it with a matchstick."
My blood pressure was shooting skywards. I just sputtered without uttering a word.

"Tell me, doctor, how do I avoid getting this dirt inside me?"
I knew that it was an unwanted pregnancy but calling it dirt was simply too much.
I replied a bit angrily, "There are tablets which can prevent this from happening. Either that or you could use protection at night."

Now it was the patient's turn to be confused.
"You mean to say that it only happens at night?"
I saw her point.
"No! No! I meant anytime of the day. Whenever you are in the mood, you should use protection."
She was left even more confused.
"It depends on my moods?"
Again I saw her point.
"My mistake. You need not be in any sort of mood. It just happens."

Abortion in Ears Part 1 | 2